Then-premier Joh Bjelke-Petersen also had an opinion on the inquiry, famously noting that if you lift up a piece of tin, you’ll find one of two things under it: “a snake or a dead cat”. This also happened in the ’80s, and was big news, especially among recently graduated law students who were full of opinions about the inquiry (which had been formed by combining the fire of righteous indignation, with complete cluelessness about the actual issues). The big way this feels like the ’80s, however, is that Tony Fitzgerald is back conducting an inquiry into corruption. If you think that doesn’t sound that bad, understand that we are talking shades of yellow and green so bright they could be seen from the space shuttle my friends have probably developed melanomas from simply standing next to me, or at least they would if they had been prepared to stand next to me while I was wearing that (which they weren’t). Admittedly, the fashion might not have been so great – I recall at one point wearing an outfit that consisted of yellow trousers, a green shirt with a yellow stripe and even yellow joggers. For a start – and this is a good thing – my gym has started playing decent music, by which I mean music from the ’80s. No, I mean because it is starting to seem a lot like the ’80s. Not because of the pandemic, although the script for that does seem to be the same as last year… masks, lockdowns, food shortages – and everything, from the Kennedy assassination to the disappearance of Harold Holt, being Scott Morrison’s fault. It seems to me that this year will be, in the immortal words of Yogi Berra, 1 “déjà vu all over again”.
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